One Year on...and a bit!!

Well here we are one year (and a couple of weeks) later. If you remember, my switch on was 11th December 2014 and I was surprised and elated by such immediate success. Picking up the phone was unthinkable before switch on, as was listening to music but these are things I have loved doing over the past year. But even simple things such as face to face conversation or going out with a group of friends have been so much more enjoyable now that I can actually follow the conversation instead of repeating something someone has already said because I missed it! Or having someone repeat a question three times (as this is the absolute unwritten rule of the maximum number of times you can ask someone to repeat) and then either guess the answer to the question or reply with one of your bank of responses that might make a decent stab at a half OK answer....Really? Oh thats good. Oh OK. Right...... Of course people who know me were well aware of these coping mechanisms before and often wouldn't let me get away with it!

The interesting thing is that, now I am back in the hearing world, I can see the way that deaf and hard of hearing people cope with living in a hearing world and can more than relate. At my father's funeral in June, I was talking to a gentleman afterwards who asked me to repeat two or three times my question then gave one of the stock answers that I listed above before catching himself and apologising stating that he has difficulties with his hearing. This was interesting to see from the other side of the fence having been on that side for a while. Obviously I felt so much compassion for someone who was struggling with progressive(gradual) hearing loss. This launched into a conversation about my journey through deafness and through to the world of sound again (see previous blogs for the history of this if you haven't already). I have to be careful what I say to people whose hearing is in decline as not everyone's experience will be like mine both before, during and after an implant but one thing I can do is offer them some kind of encouragement that: THERE IS HOPE. Declining hearing doesn't have to define us, doesn't have to be permanent and need not dictate the future. I understand the dark times where you worry about becoming deaf completely, find the noises around you confusing and distorted, the feelings of loneliness in that you can't engage on a basic level like you used to. But THERE IS HOPE.

Steve Austin - My lookalike!!

By way of work, people often ask how it has affected me. The classroom I had when I returned to work after Christmas in January 2015 wasn't carpeted (stay with me on this, it is relevant I promise!). This meant that any sound which was made in my class room was picked up with my bionic hearing (like the six million dollar man of the 1970s series....we can rebuild him....except it only cost the NHS about £20,000!! By the way. As an aside. Lee Majors (the six million dollar man) is actually now selling hearing aids!! Bizarre!) This might not sound like such a bad deal until you include chairs banging or scraping on the floor or conversations happening in another part of the room. These sounds would then infringe on the answer a child might be giving me in response. Background noise is still an issue although there is a "programme 2" button which cuts out noise behind me and allows me to hear in a more restricted circle. Despite the initial difficulties, this has gradually improved. It is not perfect or like having "normal" hearing but it is a massive improvement on before. This year since September, I have been in a classroom that has been carpeted which makes a difference in that noises are absorbed a bit more, sound doesn't echo as much and chairs don't make such a large noise when slid out or in.

Having got used to having great hearing in most situations, I am very reluctant to take the processor off.  If you remember, the processor is the bit that looks like a hearing aid that hangs on to the outside of the ear. This is connected to the implant under the skin via a cable attached to a magnet on the head piece. Now it is very important to remember that THE PROCESSOR IS NOT WATERPROOF. I have therefore been very careful to take it off before going into the shower or swimming pool. This has meant that for that length of time I am once again deaf....completely. There is absolutely no sound whatsoever when I take that thing off. When doing my aquathlon races in the summer, I would have to take it off before doing the swimming part then, because you are in such a rush to remove the wetsuit, and put on the trainers, you don't get time to fiddle around taking the processor out of the case and put it on for the run part. Its not such a hardship and its OK to shut sound off completely for a while (I'll bet there are quite a few fully hearing people who would love to do the same!). Quite often my wife, Christina, will say to me that there was loud thunder in the night to which I reply, "I feel so sorry for you hearing people at times such as this!". This is because every night I have to take off the processor and let the batteries charge. This of course means that waking up in the morning, I am dependent on someone (ie Christina) waking me up, nudging me to tell me that the alarm is sounding. Then I will press the snooze button and put on the processor meaning that I am hearing the alarm (and pressing the snooze button a few more times!)

Beautiful North devon beach (that still has my processor!!)

Now getting back to the YOUR PROCESSOR IS NOT WATERPROOF thing. In August while in rural North Devon, having walked a great part of the beautiful coast near Croyde and Woolacombe we decided to walk back along the two or three mile stretch of golden sand to Woolacombe. The sun was shining, the waves were fantastic and the sea was a great spontaneous choice for cooling down. In I ran whooping and listening to the crashing waves, dived under a wave, came up whooping again before realising that I couldn't hear myself shouting. This was the conversation I had with myself:
"Its gone quiet"
"Thats OK. You don't normally hear things in the water."
"Why not?"
"Because you take off your processor before entering the water"
"Oh OK....then why was I able to hear the waves crashing before...."
"Because you entered the sea with your processor on!"
We of course looked in vain for the shiny silver processor that had be knocked clean off my ear by one of the fantastic North Devon waves but didn't stand a hope of finding it. Devastated, I trudged along the shore with Christina who was desperately signing (yes I was deaf again) to me not to worry. This was Sunday afternoon. On the Monday, Christina, not me of course because I could only use the phone with the processor, rang the CI department in Kings Cross. The guy in the parts and repairs department (total legend!) states that he will email me a form for the loss. I fill it in and send it back immediately. He then gets another processor, programmes it for my settings and sends it to where we were staying in Woolacombe. I received it on Tuesday morning! Now that is an NHS and that is a postal service and a half! Also spare a thought for the guy in years to come who searches the shores with his metal detector and thinks he's found a fortune but finds a strange looking piece of metal with a wire and a magnet hanging from it!

My wonderfully encouraging dad.

Although I mentioned earlier that my dad unfortunately passed away in April this year, I was so happy to have spent the last four months of his life being able to listen and chat with him. He was always so very supportive in every part of my life and the gorgeous family God has given me. Years ago he encouraged me to go for the cochlear implant when it would be right. On this subject of family, this year it has been amazing to not just see my children grow up but hear them aswell. I have got used to hearing their voices although they sound different to how I remembered them from before as their voices had broken in those intervening years.

It is so easy to write about these amazing experiences without giving credit to one person who has made all of this possible. The Lord has been part of my life for many years through hearing, deafness and hearing again. Some people you hear of are miraculously healed of deafness in the same manner that Jesus himself healed people. However, my ability to hear again isn't to me any less miraculous. The fact that the Lord has created us humans with brains that are capable of inventing a way to help people hear again. That our ears are capable of being implanted with a device that effectively heals deafness. Our brains are capable of remembering sounds, interpreting sounds, making sense of the noises and world around us..... Such knowledge is too amazing for me to completely understand. Many of my friends will quite rightly attribute this to amazing scientific advances but to me, to leave it as that and not give praise and glory to Him who gave us our bodies, sounds, brains, creativity and the means for our bodies to be

Buddy my hearing dog for a deaf person...Not!

healed can't be done. We have just celebrated Christmas when we are confronted with the simple yet incredible truth that GOD IS WITH US. My experience has made me even more sure that this is true and that despite being the one who holds the universe together, he still has time to be interested in yours and my lives.

 As 2015 draws to a close and the new year is upon us, may you know amazing experiences in 2016. In good times may you know God's inexpressible joy. And in difficult times may you and I know his presence with us. HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE.